Random Theatre Story

So I just wanted to share this story because it is hilarious.

I am in a theatre class for this quarter and on the first day of class my teacher asks if he can tell us a story. Naturally we all said yes. So he begins to tell us the best theatre story I have heard so far in my short little life. (Story will be told in his point of view and loosely paraphrased)

"So I was working as a lowly stage hand in my college's production of Jesus Christ Super Star. We were a couple of weeks away from opening night when the director got the most dangerous thing someone in the theatre department can get (naturally we assumed the worst: death, broken leg, etc..): a great fricken idea. The director decides that when Jesus is on the cross and is ascending up into heaven that Jesus and the cross should ACTUALLY ascend up into the heavens because then it would be super majestic. So the stage crew rigs up a see- saw where a stage technician would stand on one end and the cross would be on the other end. And when the technician stood on his end the cross and Jesus would rise up. We practiced with it and got pretty good at it and we all thought it was super cool."

"But then the director got another great fricken idea. In order to make it even more majestic he wanted Jesus and the cross to ascend into the heavens and while they were ascending he wanted three dozen doves to be released over the stage. Well we were a little skeptical of this but we went with it, we knew a guy who knew an animal wrangler that could get us the doves. However, we wouldn't get them until opening night. So we rigged up some drop cages and filled them with stuffed animals and practiced with that. Jesus and the cross would ascend, the cue was given, and three dozen stuffed animals fell onto the stage with a squeak. We were starting to think that we could pull this off."

"Opening night arrives and we were getting all ready to go. Unfortunately, the stage technician that was supposed to stand on the see saw and ascend Jesus and the cross broke his leg and could not be in the show. So we assigned a new guy for the job, now this guy had like 100 pounds on the first guy. The show starts and it's going great and then finally it was time for the big ascension scene. The cue is given for the technician to lift up Jesus, now because this new guy had no training in his position he had no idea what to do. So he JUMPED onto his end of the see-saw. Jesus flew up into the air, hit his head on the lighting fixture, got knocked unconscious, and fell to the floor. The stage manager was so frazzled by all of this that she gave the cue for the doves to be released. Now because we had no practice with the real birds we didn't take into account that we had three dozen live doves next to extremely hot lights for about three hours. So when the cue was given to release the doves three dozen cooked birds rained down onto an unconscious Jesus. The director then gave the call to close the curtain and the show was over."

This just goes to show that the theatre business doesn't always go as smoothly as you think. Hope this story gave you some laughs I know it did for me.
P.S Jesus was ok after that (he rose again three days later)

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